Why are you here?” is the question I thought we would be asked most frequently when we first moved to ‘Magi-land’. On the surface, the country is not attractive: it’s extremely hot and polluted; there are weird smells everywhere you go; we experience multiple power outages a day; finding a green vegetable for people desiring the healthy option sometimes feels like a foolish quest; and the language is hard.
As relationships with the Magi people have deepened, however, I’ve heard a question that matters far more to them. This question isn’t ever audibly spoken, but it resounds from the hearts of many of the men I’ve gotten to know. It’s the simple question of “Can I trust you?”
The Magi are immensely hospitable and warm, but when it comes to meaningful relationships, they have much fear, mistrust and judgement of others. Without trust there are no deep relationships. Even though many Magi people are good friends, when there is a concern for what one can get out of a relationship rather than how one can give, the whole culture is affected. And Islam provides no help for true trust to be built. And why should it? Islam is not based on relationship but on the law. But whether their need for deep relationships is felt or not, almost no Magi believe they have a friend in Jesus.
Friendship is built in these ordinary moments.
In Magi-land, trust has to be earned. When we love people like Jesus, people are willing to listen. I relish getting to go out several times a week with men and sit for hours eating sunflower seeds and drinking chai in the tea houses. Friendship is built in these ordinary moments. It’s when my friend Yuri* shares how he has no close friends because he doesn’t trust anyone. He’s afraid to let anyone know him deeply for fear of them using information against him, like so many others have done to him in the past. Outwardly, he says that it’s better to be alone, but inwardly he craves to be loved and known.
Yuri’s fear of being vulnerable, yet deep desire to be known, is something we can all relate to because we were all made for deep relationships. I’ve shared with Yuri how he needs to look no further than to Jesus, the one who calls us friends rather than servants (John 15:15), the one who lays down his life in love for his friends. Wow – what a friend!
It has been a privilege to be a friend like Jesus and so have the opportunity to share what a friend we have in Jesus; the truest friend who covers our shame rather than shames us; a friend who can be trusted at all times.
Pray the Magi people would see that Jesus can always be trusted. Pray for more friends of Jesus to come to Magi-land to invite them to know the Friend of Sinners. Pray for us as we grow in speaking the Magi language and try to be a friend like Jesus.
*Names have been changed for security.
Main photo: Detail from Ishtar Gate built during the reign of King Nebuchadnezzar II c.575BC, Pergamon Museum Berlin (Corbin Mathias/unsplash.com).
R&J are church planting in the Middle East; they refer to their host nation as ‘Magi-land’ to protect their identity and the identity of those they are serving.